Charmin Harmon

My Charmin’ Harmon
So... first I need to apologize to everyone for not keeping anybody informed about what has happened in the last 2 weeks but hopefully after you read this you will understand that I wasn't intentionally being a jerk, I've been a little busy!

K... so here's the story. We went to the hospital Friday morning (it was midnight so more like Thursday night) and they started me on the drugs and the Pit. drip. Everything was going perfect I was at a 4 and about 90% when we started the epidural. Matt watched and didn't pass out... I think he was doing much better than me. My doctor came in and checked on me every once in awhile and everything looked perfect. I dialated to a 10 by about 1 or so and we were on our way. The nurses got everything ready and we were off. I pushed about 3 times before I knew that something was wrong. My doctor got the suction thingy out and she had both hands pulling him out... no luck. She kept looking at the fetal monitor and back at me. We pushed one more time and she looked at one of the nurses and asked if an Operating Room was open. I panicked. I started sobbing. My baby's heart rate was slowing each time I pushed and not recovering. He was in rough shape. My doctor kept telling me "We have to get him out now Krystal, this is our last shot... " There goes the last push and when he didn't come out she said "Let's go" and there I was being wheeled down the hall into the OR. I couldn't stop crying I was a wreck. A million things were running through my mind.... I never thought that I would be in this situation. I just said that I would see my family in just a minute. Everyone had a smile on until about 5 minutes before this. Everything was fine and now I feel like it turned into a nightmare . Everyone was trying to be optimistic, but I wasn't about to lose my baby. I immediately got onto the operating table and they stuck a sheet over me and started scrubbung down my tummy. My doctor said "Can you feel this?" Can you feel this?"... "yup" "yup" Then there she goes... both of her hands were in my stomach. The anestetiologist wasn't there yet and there wasn't much anyone else could do for me. I was screaming at the top of my lungs in agony and somewhere I must have passed out. The last thing I remember is my doctor yellling at someone to get me something for the pain and at another doctor to push the baby back out of the birth canal so we could get him out. I just looked at Matt and said "I can't do this." The rest is from Matt's perspective. He heard my doctor say "We have baby!" and he said that instantly he knew that he was going to be okay when he saw him, then he looked down at me and my eyes rolled back into my head. He thought he lost me. The anestisiologist had returned and put me completely under before he told anyone. Remembering everything that happened that night, I truly feel sorry for everything that Matt had to go through. When we checked into the hospital, we were full of life. We knew our son was on his way. We were joking with the admissions nurse and somehow we got on the subject of dying. Something about how on the entrance form they ask you why you are there and I said something like "Well, I guess if you are going to die, you don't know it when you are admitted." I said that there is still a risk of dying during childbirth and Matt said, "Well... if you are going to go, you're lleaving are son here... " "Deal" What is that called.... foreshadowing. Now he's standing with our brand new son thinking that he was alone with him. His family wasn't at the hospital and we had almost planned it that way. We thought everything would go so smoothly and that it would be a special time for the 3 of us... we were wrong.

So after he was told that I really wasn't dead and some altercation happened between the anestesiologist and him he went out and took Kaleb down to the nursery. One of the doctor's let Matt see me while I was still in surgery and he said that there was so much blood just gushing out the sides of me. My doctor finally came out and she was crying and just went into the nursery and held our son and cried. When I talked to the receptionist at her office a few days ago she said that my doctor had a really rough time with it and just cried and said, "I thought we weere going to lose him." I'm so greatful for her for making the decisions that she did when she did to give me my little boy.

So I get out of surgery and I am in recovery and I was freaking out! I didn't know if my baby made it, where he was... anything! I was crying and asking where he was and I know I was completely out of it but I felt like no one was telling me that he was alive, just trying to keep me calm. Finally one of the nurses brought me a picture of him... that was the first time I saw my son... it was a very surreal expirence. I wanted to make sure Matt was okay and they let him in for just a second. He leaned down and told me that our son was okay and that everything would be fine and he loved me, then they made him leave again. About an hour later I was back in my room and I got to hold my son for the first time... what an expirence.... I could not have been more relieved.

The next few days were pretty hard. We still have a hard time talking about it and the fact that we were so close to losing one of us... I lost a lot of blood and on Sunday had to have a blood transfusion. I'm recovering well and besides being sleep deprived am doing as well as can be expected. The snow has dampened my spirits and the fact that my only sanctuary probably would have been wal-mart but due to the shopping frenzy, have been stuck in the house. I'm trying to get out a little bit. I'll fee better when I can drve without fear of being killed by stupid drivers on the crazy ice-packed, not plowed Poky roads.

Anywho... there's the story of how my little man came into the world. It was the scariest, most painful, and besides my daughter, most rewarding thing that I have ever done in my life He's truly a blessing and a welcome addition to our family!